What an experience. I'm sure because it's my first one that I'm feeling like this. I'm pretty sure that I'll see and experience plenty more codes whether the patient comes back or gone. I'm not quite sure what I'm feeling about what just happened. The patient was at end stage with his lung disease and the family was outside of the ICU watching all of us running off the elevator and into the ICU. By the time I got there with my resident, only the daughter was there and she wanted everything to be done.
The team did 45 min of rescue with CPR and medications. Halfway through it, we all thought the patient was going to make it because he had a pulse and good rhythm. But finally it just wasn't enough and went pulseless again. Finally enough was enough and called time of death.
It was a grim reality check of our life. When I saw the white feet, I had a gut feeling that the patient wasn't going to make it but you can't say that when the family wants everything done. Life is just too short and there's no guarantee that it will be a set number of years that we get. I'm glad that I know where I'm going to be after death, with God in heaven. The death on earth is our sleeping time. I also know that even though I'm leaving my friends and family behind, I'm in comfort knowing that they know where I'm going to be and that we'll all meet again in the golden heaven.
Another that I got started to think about is DNR and organ donation. There are many forms of DNR, but I know for sure I don't want to be on a machine when my brain is dead. Intubation is questionable. All I know for sure is that I want the intubation but only till a certain point. Being on the machine without any brain function might be comforting to the family but I don't see how it could benefit the patient. Anyhoo, these are my thoughts.
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