This past weekend I was at Marywood University, Scranton, PA for my church's retreat. The theme was Abraham's journey. I thought it would be good but it was a bit confusing. The speaker was trying to speak from 2 perspectives, atheist and Christian. It would work if he wasn't contradicting himself. It got to a point where I couldn't figure out what he was trying to say. I understand that our journey with God changes as we understand Him more and how much we understands depends on God himself. I was able to get to know the speaker a bit outside of his sermon. He is definitely very clear in his thoughts but the sermon just didn't quite deliver.
The weekend also had 2 workshops. One of which was a women's workshop where it was the speaker's wife leading it. It was pretty good because she was able to give the perspective of being a 2nd generation Chinese American and how to deal with the American world and our parents. I now understand that much of my disagreements between me and my mom really stems from our differences and that we both don't really understand each other's world. It's something I would have work on for years to come. I always feel like it's very hard for me to explain to my mom and have understand what is going on my life. Most of the time, I choose to not to tell her much of my life away from home because I feel like it's one way to keep our disagreement to the minimum. Much work to do.
This weekend made me realize that I long to belong to a place, I long to call a place home. I didn't know any one there, and I was meeting new people every time and don't really how to get to close to them. I really feel like I was an outsider looking in. I don't know how to fix this. I'm really praying that God will help me find a church and a place that I can call my earthly home.
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